How I Found My Father

by Eugene Lincoln

"Who is My Family?"

The small ad caught my attention on the newspaper page. It gave the birth date and birthplace of the writer, a brief description of what he had learned of his mother and father (their height and weight, hair and eye color, etc.), and asked the plaintive question, "I would like to know, who is my family?"

Though my situation had been different, the ad stirred feelings within me that had been asleep for years. I knew my mother (she lived until I was an adult) and I knew my father -- or did I?

Fatherless child

My dad died just after my eleventh birthday. But even in the years preceding his death, I never felt I had a dad.

Because of war-incurred disabilities, my dad spent much of his time in veterans hospitals in Illinois and Pennsylvania. When he was in the VA hospital in our home town, the rules of the facility forbade my visiting him during his final illness, except briefly a couple of days before he died.

Even had he lived longer, I doubt if I would ever have known him in the sense of feeling close to him, as most sons and daughters feel about their dads. He was just not the kind of father to whom I could have said, "Dad, I have a problem. Can you help me decide what to do? or "Dad, how can I find the length of the hypotenuse if side A is three inches and side B is four inches?"

I'm sure Dad loved his children, but he never learned to let people know he loved them.

And his drinking! At that time I couldn't understand why Dad was drunk much of the time. Now, many years later, I can realize what might have driven him to take refuge in drink, though I cannot condone it.

Unfulfilled desires

After my dad's death, I lived alone with my mother. All my friends had dads who spent time with them and helped them with their school work. But I didn't. Oh, how I missed him!

My mother tried to be both mom and dad to me, but of course, that was impossible. I often daydreamed that she would remarry so I would have a dad. But she never did.

Adoption

For several years I was without a father. But then I found a Father who adopted me into His family.

I first discovered Him when I was a lonely thirteen-year-old youth with no goal, no purpose, in life. But knowing He loved me has changed all that. Long before I was born, a poet named David described Him as "a father to the fatherless" (Psalm 68:5).

He was just who I needed -- a tender, compassionate, understanding Father. He loved me so much that He sent His Son, my elder Brother, to die so I wouldn't die but live forever. Then He adopted me as His son, and "sent the Spirit of his Son" into my heart (Galatians 4:6).

I can't explain it all, that I am the adopted son of this Father. In Him I find qualities that no earthly dad could have. "His way is perfect'' (2 Samuel 22:31). He is upright and just (Deuteronomy 32:4). When I am troubled and fear grips my heart, my heavenly Father is always there to help me (Psalm 46:1, 2). No problem I encounter is too much for Him (Luke 1:37). He shows His great love for me by calling me His son and by promising that I shall someday be "like him" (1 John 3:1, 2). He will soon return to give me the reward He has promised His children (Revelation 22:12).

I am no longer searching, for I have found my Father. All the words I could summon could not tell of His goodness. Only by letting Him adopt you as His son or daughter can you experience His goodness for yourself. If you have not already done so, I pray that you too may find your Father.

Eugene Lincoln is a Christian writer living in Hagerstown, MD. Scripture quotations are from the New International Version.

The Bible Advocate Press grants the user permission only to download and print this article. If the user wishes to make multiple copies, permission must be granted by the Bible Advocate Press.