How God turns pain into purpose.
by Martha Karas
There are moments in life when everything seems to fall apart — when pain becomes unbearable and hope feels out of reach.
In 2005, I reached such a moment. I no longer wanted to live. But God met me there, at my lowest and most broken, and whispered, “Come to Me.” That moment changed everything.
Breaking point
Overwhelmed by emotional suffering, financial stress, and the collapse of my relationships, I felt rejected, unloved, and completely alone. On January 28, 2005, at age 38, I attempted to take my life.
I had grown up in a Christian home where my family attended church faithfully every week. We studied the Bible together and held morning devotions. In my early years, I was committed to learning the Bible as a child and participating in youth activities. But as an adult, I drifted far from God.
Words from God
Waking up in the ICU, surrounded by silence and sorrow, I asked myself, Why am I still here?
Then a nurse came to my bedside. She looked at me with compassion and spoke words that pierced through the darkness: “My child, God loves you. Come back to Him.”
It felt as though an angel was speaking through her. I asked her to pray with me, and in that moment, a heavy burden lifted. God’s love wrapped around me like a warm blanket. That was the beginning of my restoration.
Turning point
Leaving the hospital, I withdrew from everyone, including my fourteen‑year‑old son. At the time, I was a single parent. Shame whispered that I was unworthy, that I had failed. For months, I wrestled with questions: Why am I going through this? What good can possibly come from this pain?
Through prayer, counseling, and fellowship at a community church, God slowly restored me. Each counseling session helped me confront the lies I believed. Each prayer reminded me that He was near. Each fellowship gathering showed me that I was not alone.
Gradual healing
It was not an instant change but a gradual journey of healing. I joined the church in 2005 after my suicide attempt, and it took three years before I felt fully restored. I participated in prayer sessions, fasting, and more counseling. Many nights I cried, feeling rejected and isolated, but I kept turning to God.
I realized that pride had been one of my barriers. I had once enjoyed success and recognition in the church, but when life was good, I neglected God. Through this difficult season, I learned that faith is not only for times of struggle but also for times of blessing.
Additionally, I learned that faith doesn’t always come with answers. Sometimes it is simply a decision to trust — to stand firm when everything around you is shaking. God doesn’t ask us to understand everything. He asks us to believe.
New mission
In September 2005, God opened a door for me to prison ministry. I began sharing my story with women behind bars — not because I had been in a physical prison but because I knew what it was like to be trapped in pain.
During one of my talks, a woman listened quietly as I spoke. Tears rolled down her cheeks, and she whispered, “If God could save you, maybe He can save me too.”
That moment reminded me that our testimonies are not just for us; they are lifelines for others. My brokenness became a tool for healing as God used my suffering to bring hope to those who felt forgotten.
New job
In 2008, I began working as an office assistant at a funeral parlor. Every day, I was surrounded by coffins and grief. Families came in with heavy hearts, saying goodbye to loved ones.
At first, I wondered if I could handle it. But instead of feeling overwhelmed, I felt convicted. I had once tried to take my own life, and now I was helping others say goodbye to friends and family. Each service reminded me of the gift of life God had given me.
Often, I shared gentle words of comfort, reminding families that God was near. What could have been my end became my testimony of His mercy. Standing among the grieving, I realized that God had spared me so I could walk alongside others in their anguish.
Writing my story
As healing continued, God gave me a new passion: writing. I began working on my book, A New Beginning. Each page became a testimony of His restoration. Writing was not just therapy; it was ministry. My pen became a tool of healing, just like my voice in prison ministry and my presence in the funeral parlor.
I wanted every woman who felt stuck, rejected, or forgotten to know that God sees her, that He can turn pain into purpose, that her story is not over. Through words, I found my mission: to inspire women to rise from pain and walk in purpose.
Counting blessings
Through my challenging circumstances, I praise God that I found healing in a church that welcomed me with open arms. I found purpose in prison ministry, sharing my story with women who needed hope. I found conviction in the funeral parlor, where God reminded me of the gift of life. And I found joy in writing, knowing that even though I wasn’t perfect, He was still working through me.
This is my story, and I will keep sharing it, piece by piece, so that someone out there can find hope again. Because pain is not the end. With God, it can be the beginning of purpose.
Martha Karas is a devotional writer who has contributed to Guideposts, The Upper Room, Woman’s World, and Power for Living. Her passion is to inspire women to rise from pain and walk in purpose, sharing stories of faith, healing, and restoration. She is currently working on her first book, A New Beginning. Martha lives in Namibia, South Africa.